Keeping Your Balance as a Busy Mom
I was talking to a dear friend of mine and as we were getting off the phone, she said I wanted to ask you a quick question, "How do you balance it all and get everything done." I was stunned for a minute, because a) I was actually shocked that someone would ask me this, as I feel like I'm a hot mess most of the time, and b) is there such a thing as true balance???? It took me a minute to answer, and now that I've had time to reflect, here are some thoughts that come to my mind:
- Wake up early!!! There are several studies out there that lean towards waking up early and success. When I wake up the very first thing I do is get out of bed and do a 5 minute yoga session to calm the mind and body. I then change and workout at home. I find that if I don't do this in the morning, 9 times out of 10 I find a reason why I can't work out later. For me, this is the perfect way to start the day.
- Use a timer when completing tasks. I find this extremely helpful as there are times when you can completely lose yourself in something and all of the sudden an hour has passed!! I'm so guilty of this with social media!! The timer keeps you aware of time especially if you are on a time budget.
- Get rid of the all or nothing mentality. This one was huge for me. I have realized that time is precious now--there are days when I look back to thinking what the heck did I do with my time?!?! When I have a window of just a half hour, it's ok to do a short workout--before I would have needed at least an hour and if I didn't have that, I wouldn't workout, I would find another time to do it. Well, now I have come to realize that sometimes a half hour is all I get and that is ok--it's better than nothing. Same with things like getting ready. As you know makeup is a huge obsession of mine, but playing around with new makeup styles does not happen as often as I would like to, but that's ok. The minimum (which will be a later blog post) will do, and make me feel good--see what I'm saying--a little mascara, some coverup, and my eyebrows penciled in and I'm good! You have to find short cuts in life while we have little ones around.
- Realize it takes a village. This was by far the biggest lesson that I learned being a Mommy. I am the type of person that likes control and likes to do it all myself. Well let's face it, that isn't always good for a child. They need to be adjusted to other people and feel secure with other people besides their mother. It's difficult for me to ask for help, but once I saw how much more well rounded Kensie was starting to become, I see a need to rely on the village of people.
- There are days when you feel like the best mom in the world, and there are days when you feel like a failure. Use those days as a learning lesson, and realize that everyone has those days! There are some days when I feel spot on, like I can do this--this is so easy!! Then others when I just can't get out of my own way. As the rollercoaster of life, the same is with motherhood. We wouldn't have such great days, if it weren't for the low days.
- Lists. Of course I wouldn't leave this one out!I I find that keeping them on my phone is the best way, that way, I will typically not forget the list. My favorite is the Paperless app. I have come to realize that usually my lists won't get done in a day, but they are extremely helpful to my ever forgetting brain!!!
- Realize when you need some time to yourself and voice it. I'm still learning this one, but I do realize that there are times when you just need to get away, and that's ok. You will come back refreshed. Your children need to see that it's ok to put yourself first every once in a while. Sometimes a lunch with your girlfriends is just what the doctor ordered!
- When things don't go as planned do the best you can to make accommodations and move on. I'm a big planner, so I had a tough time with this. My daughter isn't the best sleeper, so there are often times when she will wake up unexpectedly. I have learned that when I'm feeling overwhelmed and she wakes up with me thinking that I had an hour to get more things done around the house, it's best to involve her in the chores. Granted she is almost 2, but she does like to "Help Mommy." She even says that when she is dumping the cat food in the garbage and pouring their water on the floor :) She loves to help me with laundry, mainly because she likes to press the buttons. She loves putting stuff away so I will send her on little errands. The point is that you won't always get stuff done that you want to get done, but involving them with daily tasks is great, and fun too.
- When all else fails, laugh and smile and know that this too shall pass.
xo,
Rachel Ibbison